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Monthly Archives: September 2017

Avenues and Alleyways…


Diary of Doctor J. Watson

As I followed Sikes down the alley, the stench of the river assaulted my nostrils, warning me our route was now running perilously close to the banks of the Thames – one slip and either of us might disappear forever beneath those treacherous waters, sinking into the mud and slime of that deadly channel.

“Urry up, Docter,” urged Sikes, taking hold of my jacket. “I fink I just saw ‘im up ahead.”

We had reached the corner of the alley where the darkness was less all-encompassing. I could now make out the lights of the south bank glowing dully across the water in front of us. To our right, a dim figure was running towards a group of what I supposed to be warehouses by the water’s edge.

“That’s him,” I said, and we set off again along a solid, but slippery pathway.

The man vanished into a gap between the warehouses and, not wishing to play the hero, I allowed my companion to go first.

“Don’t you worry, Docter,” said he. “I’ll protect yer.” And with that, Sikes dashed into yet another dark alley.

Shading my eyes the better to see my way through the shadowy passage, I hastened along behind him, completely failing to notice a hand reaching out of the shadows as I passed a small doorway. A moment later, I was jerked roughly into one of the sheds and thrown to the floor.

“Now, look here…” I started, getting to my feet, but two burly figures pushed me back down, their filthy boots pinning my arms to the floor.

“No, Doctor Watson,” said a deep and gravelly voice. “You look here.”

Peering upwards, I could just make out the outline of my captor’s head and shoulders – the silhouette of his black Fedora telling me I had found my quarry.

“Ah-ha,” I shouted, hoping to sound a little less fearful than I felt. “So there you are, Mister Claw.”

The man bent down towards me and his fetid breath wafted over my face – garlic and stilton cheese, if I’m not much mistaken.

“Yes,” he muttered, holding up his right arm. “And you will feel the benefit of this specific part of my anatomy burrowing its way into that part of you where the sun does not shine, if you fail to heed my warning.”

Staring at the man’s arm, I gasped. On the end of his limb in place of a human hand, a glinting metallic shape glinted metallicly in the moonlight, via an appropriately located skylight above my head.

“Perhaps you’d care for a demonstration of my bottom-ripping tool? I’d be delighted to insert The Claw into your orifice, Doctor…” The moonlight glinted on his teeth and I noticed that they too had a metallic quality to them.

“Er, no, that’s alright, thanks,” I mumbled.

The Hooded Claw straightened up and stepped backwards into the doorway. “That’s what I thought. I trust our paths will not cross again?”

I was sorely tempted to utter some threat to the effect that myself and Holmes would track him down come hell or very high water, but the words melted in my mouth and I simply nodded.

A moment later he and his burly assistants were gone, and I was left staring up at the moon and wishing I was in quite a different location. It occurred to me I had made the silliest of mistakes and run directly into what should have been obvious as a trap. No doubt Holmes would not have succumbed to such a schoolboy error. I sniffed and would have taken a few moments to gather my dignity, but the thudding of footsteps in the alley warned me I was no longer alone.

“Oh, there yer are,” said Bill, popping his head round the doorway. “Fraid we lost him. Must ‘ave jumped on a barge or summat.”

“Yes,” I said. “He must.”

I got to my feet, but my usual steely resolve had petered out and I had no desire to do anything other than go home and hug my dear wife. “Right,” I said. “Which way out, Bill?”


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Posted by on September 28, 2017 in Detective Fiction

 

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To the Dark Side…


Diary of Doctor J. Watson

I am thankful to be once more in the bosom of my dear wife this morning, after a lengthy, albeit fascinating, overnight visit to the slums of Londen Towne. Following my plan to ply our old friend Bill Sikes with a few shillings in exchange for an insight into the slovenly ways of the lower classes (and in particular, begging his assistance in locating the individual known as The Hooded Claw), I called on Sikes at his lodgings at 14A Nobfiddler’s Lane. I found that same fellow imbibing a pot of what he likes to call ‘Charlie’.

“Docter Watson, my old pal,” said he, stumbling back from the door. “I ain’t never been so ‘appy ter see yer.”

Inviting me in, he offered me a mug of the aforementioned drink, which I sensibly declined. After we’d settled ourselves in front of the fire and warmed our hands (for it was truly a disagreeably cold evening), I told him what I wanted.

Sikes frowned and gazed into his pint pot. Finally, he looked up. “Well, Docter, I ‘ave ‘eard of this feller what yous talkin’ about, but I’m powerful certain you won’t be wantin’ ter track him down.”

“Why ever not?” said I.

“Cos where he be found, ain’t a place as I’d be ‘appy ter be takin’ you, on account of you being a gen’leman, an’ that.”

I assured him that I was more than up to the task of dealing with a little ‘working class dirt,’ and that I should be happy to accompany him to wherever he was inclined to take me.

Back on the street, the fog was rolling in from the Thames and there was a sharp nip in the air. I began to wonder if I should heed Bill’s advice. However, I was also curious to explore ‘The Dark Side’ of Londen, as my companion called it, and we thus set out towards the docks.

A short while later, we found ourselves at Cutter’s Corner, an area frequented by pickpockets, murderers and limerick-writers. Bill urged me to stay close and held onto my jacket, guiding me towards a particularly dilapidated building.

“In there,” he muttered, pointing to a rickety doorway.

We crossed the street and I gave the outer door a gentle push. It creaked open, revealing a dark passage beyond. At the far end, was the faint glimmer of candlelight. Taking my courage in both hands, I strode forward and knocked on the door.

After a moment, a head appeared, followed by a scrawny neck and shoulders. “Whatcha want?”

I raised my hat. “Ah, good evening sir, I wonder if…”

The door slammed shut.

Bill sighed and pushed past me. With a single kick, he caved in the door and bounded into the room.

The owner of the scrawny neck was an old man who was now cowering behind a table, hands trembling, and eyes as round and bloodshot as any I have yet seen.

Grabbing the man by the neck, Bill slammed him against the wall. “What you know abaht this geezer they call the ‘Ooded Claw’, eh?”

The man shook his head so vigorously, I thought it might fall off. Gazing past me, he pointed a feeble finger.

Turning to look back along the passage, I caught sight of a familiar figure silhouetted in the doorway, the gas lamp outside casting an eerie glow around his features.

“That’s him!” I cried.

Bill shoved the old man aside and the two of us hurried back to the street, but The Hooded Claw (for I am certain it was he), had disappeared.

We stood in the street, our eyes searching every nook and corner for our quarry, but there was nothing to see but darkness and creeping fog all around.

“I know where he’s gone,” said Bill, hurrying past me. “Come on, Doc.”

I ran down the cobbled lane after him, unsure of my surroundings and feeling more than a little afraid. If I lost sight of Sikes, I’d have a jolly hard time finding my way home again.

As we ran into a dark alley, I felt that familiar loosening sensation in my nether regions…

 
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Posted by on September 5, 2017 in Detective Fiction

 

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